Ayden asked me today if I would leave her at home while Taylor and I went to Kuk Sool. She said that she was tired and didn't want to do Kuk Sool anymore. I was tempted for a moment but decided not to risk it. I just knew the one time I neglect one of my children I would get busted. I am guessing that telling Social Service, "At least I wasn't gambling" wouldn't cut it. Anyway, her instructors informed me of the fact that Ayden is very close to testing for her yellow stripe so Ayden and I will need to have a conversation about what this means to her. She's been using the line, "Mommy, I will do it if you want me to but I want you to know that I really don't want to. I'm just doing it for you." We'll see what happens.
Work has been very busy lately. My colleague is retiring so I'm taking on all of the major relationships in this market. Though most people believe that my job is rather cushy, I have actually been putting in a lot of hours on the weekends and in the evenings. My work goals are extremely challenging this year and we are being asked to do more with less. This is going to be a tough year. I'm already starting to feel the pressure.
On the home front, things have been good. I've recently felt a great sense of calm come over me. The mediating has been helping tremendously. I feel like this spiritual/emotional journey I have been on for the past three years is finally at a point where I have clarity. It seems like at all points in my life, just when I think I have figured things out, something changes and I need to figure it out again. I am having to reassess constantly. Am I the only person who has to do this? I am optimistic about the future. I am choosing to live life consciously, intentionally and in the moment.
Peace and Love
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4 comments:
i'm really proud of you. and no, you are not the only person who has to reassess life at every turn. every step in a healthy and positive life serves only to lead us to the next challenge. it's then that we must decide if we will meet the new challenge with focus, clarity, and determination, or if we will turn away. sounds like you definitely aren't turning away these days - and that's really good. xoxo
Hi Kaohly. This is Mang. I actually came from Kaosong's page. I was thinking of you awhile back. I hope you still have some memory of me. I was the young gal many years ago, when you and your husband took over education with the Methodist church. I was also helping teach 2nd grade Sunday school. You made your rounds sometimes, by saying hi to the kids.
About your short entry there, I too feel sometimes in my life where I am unsure of where I am standing. (And I'm only 25 now) Whether I debate about religion or just my life in general. But reading it from your standpoint also gives me a more clear idea that I still have a long ways to go. It seems like you're doing fairly well.
When did you move back to the cities? Two daughters already, eh?
I've been waiting to see that movie for like over a year now! I saw it as soon as it became avail. in theatres. it was really sweet (love love love james mcavoy), I love christina ricci. Did the girls like it? I saw it by myself but I liked it!
After a month of NOT working out, i'm back on track to working out. I re-joined women on weights - the class that meets twice a week and i'm back on the machines. I'm going to focus on strength training more now, i'll still do cardio but my focus will be on strenth training. It's time to try something different. You?
I'm really happy for you regarding your progress!!!!!!
Hi Kaohly,
I loved this post and also offer my assurances that you are not the only person that has to reassess life regularly. It is worth mentioning that as human beings we never get our lives into little boxes all safe and secure and 'tidy'. As soon as we get close, something - anything - will come along and mess it up :o)
Keep doing what you're doing and you will get close to a 'tidy' life, mind, body and spirit. By your own admission it sounds as though its helping and you're feeling good. What more can you ask?
Keep posting I enjoy reading.
PSBN Jon (UK)
Ps: Have you asked your daughter to speak to your instructor about her not wanting to do kuk sool anymore? Sometimes its better when they aren't speaking to mommy or daddy. My son Luke (10) started kuk sool at 4 yrs old. He got fed up at brown belt and took nearly 2 years out. I didn't force him but told him he could always continue if and when he felt ready. When he saw his previous peers get their black belts he was back with more motivation that I have ever seen in a child. He will be getting his black belt in June at the UK Championships bless him!
Would love to hear from you - you know how to contact me.
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