Lost Ritual Found

 When did my chubby baby turn into this beautiful big girl?

Tonight, when Taylor went to bed, I laid with her.  Something I did with her almost every single night until about two years ago when she was in the sixth grade.  I remember reading once how magical this time is.  How this is the time they tell you everything.  And when this was part of our routine, it was magical.

Tonight, as we laid together in her bed, she poured out her heart.  We talked about her disappointment in herself, her struggles, the stress she feels but most importantly, that she is not living up to her father and my expectation.

Her tears broke my heart.  I had no idea how much hurt she was feeling inside.  In the process of trying to make her strong and confident, I forgot to tell her that it is okay to feel weak and vulnerable.  Not knowing all the answers, and not doing all the right things is normal for someone her age.  I think I forgot that making mistakes and learning from those mistakes is part of growing up.

I will remember to manage my expectations, allow her to make mistakes and learn from them, and reminder her often how much I love her.  I will also lay with my girls as often as I can.  I will never get this time back.  I will treasure these moments.  Never again will I let the magic of the calm night and the opportunity to listen pass me by.

Are we the 1%?

The other day while sitting at the Minneapolis airport Ayden asked her father if we were the 1%.  At first I didn't know what to make of it.  I was actually a little perplexed.

My kids do not have iPads, iPones, or hand held game devices.  We don't buy them Christmas presents, birthday presents, or holiday presents.  We rarely see movies at the theater and when we do we only go to the discount theater where admissions for the four of us is $6 (throw in a bucket of popcorn and it's date night for under $10).  We don't have a big house, we don't have expensive cars (in fact we only buy used cars) nor do we have expensive toys (we buy our bikes used from Cycles for Change, we take hand me down scooters, etc...)  We rarely eat out, we don't have text, they get to watch about an hour of TV a week, they don't have Facebook just to name a few things that are missing from their lives.

After a good laugh Kong explained to her who is included in the 1%.  If that wasn't funny enough to answer Ayden asked Kong what percent our family does belong in.  It made for an interesting conversation.

I would like to believe that Ayden thought we were in the 1% because she is surrounded by so much love and attention that she does not realize all that she does not have.  As I think about how this could be I feel so blessed to have this circle of love which includes grandparent, great aunts & great uncles, aunts, uncles, cousins and our entire extended family.  These amazing people make my children's lives so full that they feel like millionaires. What more could you ask for?